The reason why close families are close is because family life is prioritized over everything else. You must consciously decide that your kids come before your sales target or your round of golf. Other aspects of parenting will automatically fall into place. It’s time to bridge that gap! Here are 12 ways that will help the cause.
1. Spend Quality Time
There is no substitute for quality time spent with children. Children cherish the time spent alone with a parent and sometimes a one on one interaction can be the happiest memory for a child. This is especially applicable and challenging in today’s frenzied and demanding world. Toys can be the perfect medium. Buy toys for your kids and help them play with them. If you feel you don’t even have time buying toys, buy kids toys online. There is no reason to not spend time with your kids.
2. Engage in family rituals
The role of family rituals like Christmas and Thanksgiving is huge in our complicated and frenetic society. Smaller rituals like a family meal and celebrating Mother’s Day and Father’s Day help in a big way. Sometimes ‘Let’s do pizza’ works better than ‘I love you’
3. Choose your words with care
Children must be addressed in a manner that is in no way harsh, accusatory or abusive. Also, how we tend to speak to each other within a family goes a long way towards pulling people close or driving them apart. Words tend to linger on and must be spoken wisely and carefully.
‘I love you, but…’
“Why can’t you be more like your elder sibling?”
“You’ve got no future”
“I wish I’d never had a child like you.”
“You’re so smart.”
“I love you!”
“I’m so happy we have you.”
‘You are more responsible than many adults.’
4. Praise them
Children are drawn more to parents who praise them. So shower your kids with compliments both privately and publicly. If they have built up a beautiful Lego blocks creation, then praise them and make sure you praise them in front of others too and not only privately.
|Photo credits : ahaparenting.com|
5. Build a routine
Snuggle with your children for five minutes as soon as they wake up, walk with them to the school bus and slip a love note into their lunch box. Spend an extra minute on the breakfast table to enquire about their plans for the day. Do not overwork yourself so you can spend some quality time at play in the evening.
6. Cultivate a sense of humor
A sense of humor is effective to diffuse a tense situation especially when children quarrel. Kids are drawn to a funny disposition than an overtly serious one.
7. Teach love
Love can be expressed and taught through gestures, smiles and actions to create both closeness and an emotionally healthy home environment. Teach your children to love and be loved.
8. Be a friend, philosopher and guide
It is becoming increasingly difficult for children to make friends in today’s world. So parents must be the friend, philosopher and guide to necessitate closeness.
Enjoy reading aloud that bedtime story. You’ll be surprised at the amount of closeness it can generate. Make sure you a story time everyday where you can read stories to your child, no matter it is a Batman comic or other action figures.
10. Minimize Gadgets and devices
Switch off that cell phone and turn off that television. Toys are perfect for positive engagement instead. The focus should be on the child. Gadgets and devices can be distracting.
11. Use 3 important words
The closeness of a family depends on the power of forgiveness. Words like “Please forgive me” and “I forgive you” work better as a cleansing agent. Anger is sometimes unavoidable but must be followed up by asking for the child’s forgiveness.
12. Be available
Be Available! The closeness of family members depends on the understanding that each can interrupt work schedules and call on the other whenever there is a family urgency.
About the Guest Author:
Charu Swaroop contributes to Toy Tasting, video review channel on toys by mothers. When time permits, Charu loves dreaming up and trying new dishes. She has been promising herself to get over her sweet tooth (since 2003), and to trek in Nepal (since 2009).